I’m beginning to wonder if the “terrible twos” have begun in our home this past week.
She has began demanding, “Hurry up, Mama!” ”Get up, Mama!” ”Mama, draw now!” There are times when I’ve kindly, and not so kindly (SHAME SHAME), said not right now. But mostly, I am just trying to wrap my head around so many ideas.
She must have heard me demand of her SO many times. ”V, hurry up! Let’s go!” ”V, let’s put your diaper on!” I can only imagine where she learned to demand of others. Now, after looking back on it all – I can see why she gets so furious with the demands.
Because if I hear one more, “Mama do such and such right now!” I might blow a gasket!
Why? Why does her requesting of me make me so angry? Why can I literally feel the anger building? Why if she wants something does it almost put me on the edge… like nails on the chalkboard?
Why?
Because who really likes being told what to do?
Do you?
I don’t. I don’t like people “making” me do something, and I’ll admit sometimes I don’t even like them even suggesting I do something.
So maybe it’s not the “terrible twos!” Maybe we are just at a point where we can both communicate well enough to tell each other what to do, but neither of us wants to hear it and neither of us is communicating in a way that we can both do what we want to do (most of the time).
We just need to learn new scripts!
I’ll be learning more empathy and how to dance with her this week. 
Two and three are such important ages. It’s when they discover and establish their autonomy, partially by testing it out on others.
And I agree. I can be SO hard to go along with; important but hard. For me it triggers a lot of old stuff about kids “dominating” us…which for me always boils down to a fear of what others would think. Awareness of our own stories is powerful though. Now I can realize when I’vebeen triggered and sit with it, investigate it and allow myself to let it go.
Yes! You have nailed it, my friend. I can feel me getting so fired up about her “passionate attitude” when it feels like she’s “running my life.” When I realize it’s a give and take to make both of us happy then it’s just that — we can both be happy.
And to feel under a microscope… that’s a whole other post.
Thanks for your response, Tara. There have been so many times I’ve thought of setting up a chat session with you these past few weeks… being a mindful mom is hard work!